Romance is one of those fundamental ingredients of a successful relationship. Women love attention, nice gestures, gifts, compliments, favors. They love when a man can be creative and show his affection in a special way.
Romance is also a fundamental part of building Attachment. If you remember the article called Elixir Of Love (which I guess you’ve read, if not, then it’s a must read) then Attachment is one of the three ingredients of Love.
In that article I talked about Love being the mix of Attraction, Attachment and Attitude. And in another article I talked about what is Attraction in particular and gave you examples of how to build Attraction, check out the article here. (I suggest that you read those two articles before reading this one)
In this article I am going to explain, what Attachment really is and how to use one of the most powerful attachment tools, which is Romance, to get your girl to feel a powerful connection to you.
What Is Attachment?
So if Attraction is the Playful and Challenging part of a relationship, then Attachment is the Fulfilling and Comforting part of the relationship.
Attachment means trust in each other, comfort with each other’s presence, romance, security and stability, and hope for an endless relationship.
It’s the part of the relationship that feeds her heart and gives her certainty about your love for her.
Yes, women might be attracted in the beginning, but they also need attachment to stay in a relationship long term and especially long distance.
They need to feel the love, they need to have the trust, they need to be comfortable talking about anything with their partners, and they need to hope that everything will turn out fine – that’s exactly what building Attachment means.
How To Build & Maintain Attachment?
Attachment can be maintained just like attraction in a few different ways. One of the best ways to keep your girl attached to you is by being romantic.
In this article I’ll share with you a few basic but vital ways of being romantic, and thus building attachment.
My definition of being romantic is:
Showing affection for her in a very special and thoughtful way.
So let’s get started…
Make her feel like a little princess, give her very specific compliments that show that you’re attention to her, and notice some of her best qualities. But never subestimate the power of a simple “Honey, you are just so beautiful today!” or “I love the way you look today.”
A few examples of great compliments are:
- Ones that express appreciation for what she has put effort into, for example if she has put effort into putting make up on, choosing the right clothes to show up in front of the camera, or arranging her hair in a nice way, then compliment her on those things.
- Ones that are very specific to her, like having that innocent smile that makes your hearth melt when you see it. Or that weird but special look that she gives you sometimes…etc.
- Compliments that emphasize her personality qualities…her creativity, her craziness, her intelligence, her spontaneity and her adventure spirit etc.
Surprises are a great way of breaking the routine and bringing new emotions in the relationship.
The internet is full of various ideas of how to make some cute surprises to your girlfriend, some of them are: sending flowers, mailing her love letters(don’t forget to put some perfume on them, and a dried flower), buying some cute gifts, sending her some phone credit (ezetop.com), creating a special video for her, visiting her without notice, etc.
Meaning that you do something for her, which shows that you care, and you’re ready to help her out, if need would be.
A few examples are: writing a poem, a song, a sexy story, helping her with something that she needs, doing something that she asked you to do. (yes that’s being romantic too)
4. Unexpected love texts.
Love texts are a very cute way of telling her a special “I love you” when she least expects it. Send her a romantic text at times when she’s very busy with something, or when she’s in middle of an exam, an interview, or late at night etc.
The idea here is to avoid predictability, because predictability kills relationships. It literally does!
5. Paying attention to details.
It’s so often that women blame us for not noticing new changes in their hairstyle, their manicure, their clothing or anything else that they’ve gotten new.
And I perfectly understand that, we men, we like to look at the big picture and don’t really zoom in to specific details. Besides, after a while of being together, we get so used to the other person that we even forget that she’s a really beautiful girl, not to mention that she’s got some new image changes.
However, because we don’t normally do it, women tend to appreciate it even more. And if you are a man who can pay attention to details and compliment her on them, she’ll feel like you really care about her and you’re special, not like the other 80% of men out there.
6. Bragging about her to others.
I cannot stress enough about how valuable this is to women.
You see, when you tell her directly that she’s amazing, she could think that you’re trying to make feel good, or you’re just being polite, however when you tell someone else that she’s a cool person and then she finds out about it from that other person…it’s totally the next level of making her a compliment.
Another variation of this could be: When having a conversation with other people and she’s present at that conversation, to brag a little about how amazing of a girlfriend she is.
I personally did this a few times, and my girl kept telling me and reminding me for a long time about how nice of me it was to speak so fine about her to my friends. She felt really special!
7. Appreciating what she does for you.
Being romantic it’s not necessarily only about giving, but also about receiving with gratitude what you’re given.
If you are doing things right and making sure that she feels loved and appreciated, and at the same time she feels challenged by you, then she’ll also have the tendency to give back to you the affection that she receives.
And when she does that, you want to be appreciative, and tell her how much you love her for being such a caring girlfriend.
8. Be a gentleman (when you meet)
Being a gentleman, is never a bad idea. And never be fooled by the fact that being a gentleman will make her loose attraction for you, as some might say.
There are other ways to create attraction, check them out here, but being a gentleman shows masculinity and maturity.
What it means to be a gentleman? Well, it’s simple: opening the doors for her, helping her take her jacket (sometimes, not always), pulling the chairs for her, helping her to carry heavy bags etc. These are all examples of being a real gentleman.
Women love to be treated with respect, and being a gentleman is a very simple and easy way to do that.
The only objection I have though is not to overdo it, meaning that you don’t start kissing her hands, taking her jacket and pulling the chairs for her 100% of the time. You wanna be sporadic about it, and surprise her from time to time, otherwise she’ll take it for granted and you’ll become her personal “assistant”.
Next Level Of Romance
If you want to be even more effective in the way you use romance in your relationship, then you should mix romance with other attraction tools like teasing, unpredictability, role-plays, constructive jealousy etc.
Let’s see how can you mix romance with teasing…
- You help her take out her jacket and then play around a bit with the jacket like you’re about to throw it away, instead of putting it on the chair.
- Or you send her a love text message saying something like: “It’s so hard to have you far away, and not be able to hug you right now, kiss you really hard and then send you to the kitchen to cook some food for me…because I am starving!”
- Or when appreciating something that she told you, or did for you, you could say: “Sweetie, that was so nice of you, I mean it really made feel like you care about me…But don’t think that you’re gonna seduce me so easily! You’ve gotta work harder baby!”
- Or when doing something nice for her, like writing her a love poem, to which she’d say “thank you baby, it was so nice”…then you could say “I am happy that you loved it…but you know what – don’t get used to it!”
So you want to be nice to her, be romantic, but at the same time attractive. That is the best way to keep your woman in love “forever”. That is how you build both attraction and attachment. If you look around at any successful couples, you’ll notice that they’re able to keep this playfulness always on.
With Love and Respect,
P.S. Don’t forget to Download the Free 39 pages E-Book, about the 3 worst mistakes that men make in long distance relationships.