What You Thought That Brings Her Closer, Actually Pushes Her Away!

love and familiarity

As we spend time with someone, we gradually forget about how valuable that person is, how attractive that person is, and ultimately how lucky we are to have them in our lives.

Familiarity is a very interesting phenomenon, because we can get familiar with both good and bad things.

For example we may meet a very “unattractive” person, and be displeased at first, but then after spending a week or two with that person we will start to see them as perfectly normal. And that’s because when we get used to their appearance, we stop being displeased by it.

The same happens with an amazingly beautiful person, or an interesting person, or a charming person… at first we appreciate their quality a lot, but then after a while it becomes a normal thing for us.

And that’s because we became familiar with it. We got used to it.

So familiarity makes us “forget” how attractive our partner actually is.

The more time we spend together, the more familiar we become and the more we take our partner’s attractiveness for granted.

How do we prevent that? 


We remind our partner of our value and attractiveness.

There are many great ways to do that, and one of them is something that I call “constructive jealousy”.

The way this works is that when you receive some attention from a woman, be it an innocent compliment, a friendly remark about the way you look, an invitation to an event, a prolonged look at you at the supermarket, or an overly friendly treatment from a girl… you could casually tell your romantic partner about that, and thus “remind” her about the fact that other women find you attractive.

You cannot imagine how powerful this little technique is. 

Just think of those moments when your girlfriend told you about other guys giving her attention.

How did you feel? Jealous, right?

But was it a bad type of jealousy? No, it wasn’t. Because she didn’t do anything wrong, she just received the attention, she didn’t initiate or act up on it. So you felt that little tension, which actually made you more attracted to your partner.

The same thing happens when you tell your partner about receiving attention from women.

Now, you don’t have to do this all the time, but casually telling her from time to time about such innocent incidents has a powerful effect on her attraction towards you.

P.S. If you wanna learn 6 of my favorite attraction techniques that I use to keep my girlfriend addicted to me, check out the Borderless Attraction Guide. You’ll love it.

About Livius Besski

After knowing nothing about love and getting his heart broken over and over again, Livius has decided to figure this topic out. And for the past 10 years he has discovered the counter-intuitive way love works, has created a system for overcoming neediness (which is holding most guys back) and is now sharing all of his practical advice here on the site.