Love Always Wins, Not!

long distance love

In the last few articles that I posted we talked about Trust and Communication, and now it’s time to talk about Love. As you’ve already seen in the previous articles the Love, Trust and Communication triangle is the standard advice people use to give each other in terms of surviving long distance relationships.

But nobody tells you that love is actually a verb, not a noun, and that you have to actually make love happen, you have to sustain it, you have to nurture it, so that it stays alive and doesn’t fade away.

Unfortunately we have the classic “No matter what happens, love always wins!” motto that usually guides us, and it guides us in the wrong direction!  And then a few months or years later, one out of two couples get divorced, long distance relationships end up ruined and hearths get broken. So sad, yet so true.

And it’s sad because there is a very popular belief in our society that love just happens between two people and no matter what happens, in the end LOVE will make things right, and people will be happy.

This belief is created by happy ending romantic movies (which we love, but are not real), by touching love songs, by romance novels that (mostly) girls use to read, and by famous quotes written by hopeless romantics in the midst of a burning love (which then most probably faded away and broke their hearts, but it was too late, because they’ve already written the quotes. 🙂

Now, I am not saying that love is not an amazing force that moves people and overcomes obstacles, because love really is an amazing force. What I am saying though, is that we shouldn’t simply RELY on love all by itself, BUT take responsibility for sustaining it.

We tend to easily accept the belief that love will cut it, all by itself, because it’s the easiest way to approach relationships – it takes away the responsibility for making the relationship work, and we say: It’s not working, well, I guess it’s because there is no more love! and we give up.

NO, it’s not working because you’re not nurturing the love in your relationship, because you’re ignorant, that’s why it’s not working. There are MANY ingredients to this miraculous recipe that we call love, which we have to be aware of and which we have to build constantly.

We need to be caring and romantic, we need to be playful and challenging, then we also have to be mature and confident… and that’s how we sustain love in a relationship.

I have detailed the recipe of keeping love alive in THIS ARTICLE, which I highly suggest that you read – because love really has a predictable formula, which now you can discover in this eye-opening article, and learn to sustain it actively, instead of just relying on it, as most of us do, and end up with a broken heart.

Further Reading: The Elixir Of Love Discovered!

So, keep in mind, love is a verb, not a noun, and you should practice it daily.

Take care,

Besski Livius                                                                                            Photo by h.koppdelaney

About Livius Besski

After knowing nothing about love and getting his heart broken over and over again, Livius has decided to figure this topic out. And for the past 10 years he has discovered the counter-intuitive way love works, has created a system for overcoming neediness (which is holding most guys back) and is now sharing all of his practical advice here on the site.


  1. guilherme santos says:

    Your articles are so good! seriously